The Spello Dictionary

Standard spellos

A spelling dictionary for technoids, modern businesspeople, and others who did not learn to spell in school.  This really is intended to be helpful.  

"Make it possible for programmers to write in English, and you will find that programmers cannot write in English." (Comment on the possibilities for natural language programming)

"Make it idiot-proof, and someone will find a better idiot." (Caution from human factors group)

A typo is a misspelling that results from a slip of the finger on the keyboard. If the author notices the mistake, it gets fixed. A spello is a misspelling that results from a slip of the mind. If the word is then accurately transcribed, the author beams with pride over the wording of the document while the reader winces.

Most readers on the net these days are reluctant to correct the spelling in email, memos, etc., for fear of being labeled "!@#$%^&*ing nitpickers." This guide is intended as a self-help manual for all who care. More help is available in the orthography section in the back of a dictionary.

I'm not perfect, either, of course. Please feel free to complain about my sloppy grammar or informal idiom, or even spelling.

Standard spellos (in no particular order)

 

APOSTROPHES, PLURALS, POSSESSIVES, AND CONTRACTIONS

There is enormous confusion today about the use of the poor apostrophe. How can one poor, humble piece of punctuation cause so much confusion? Well, it can.

First, PLURALS. Plural words are NOT formed by adding apostrophe-s to the end of the singular word. This is very common -- and very jarring -- today. Some of these make my teeth hurt. Every one of these examples is one I have seen recently, some of them in email, some of them in signs in stores. :-(

SINGULAR	WRONG PLURAL	RIGHT PLURAL

car		car's		cars
box		box's		boxes
president	president's	presidents
country		country's	countries

Second, POSSESSIVES. Generally, possessive nouns ARE formed by adding apostrophe-s to the end of the word.

NOUN		CORRECT POSSESSIVE

car		the car's engine
box		the box's contents
president	the president's advisor
country		the country's flag

However, possessive pronouns do NOT have apostrophe-s on the end.

PERSON		WRONG POSSESSIVE	RIGHT POSSESSIVE

I					my, mine
we		our's			ours, our
he					his
her		her's			hers, her
it		it's			its
you		your's			yours, your
they		their's			theirs, their
they		there's			theirs, their
they		theyre's		theirs, their
who		who's			whose

Third, CONTRACTIONS. Contractions are used to indicate the loss of one or more letters in the middle of a common phrase. The apostrophe is inserted in the place where the letters were deleted.

ORIGINAL	LETTERS		CONTRACTION
PHRASE		REMOVED

I am		a		I'm
we are		a		we're
you are		a		you're
he is		i		he's
she is		i		she's
it is		i		it's
they are	a		they're
is not		o		isn't
are not		o		aren't
cannot		no		can't
would not	o		wouldn't
have not	o		haven't
I will		wi		I'll

etc.

Sometimes-seen wrong versions include "couldent," "dident," "wouldent," "cant," and so forth. 

ITS, IT'S

Probably the most common error among these is the use of "it's" where "its" is intended. The " 's" on "it's" looks like the possessive form, as in "Charles's," but it's not.  In "it's," it's a contraction.

This pair is particularly troublesome for many: a possessive pronoun with no apostrophe versus a contraction with an apostrophe.  The confusion here is that apostrophes are used for possessive nouns: Adam's apple, Eve's apple, Midsummer's eve.  But this is not generally the case for possessive pronouns: his, hers, ours, yours, and its.  He tipped his hat.  An idea before its time. 

"It's" with the apostrophe in it is a contraction, not a possessive.  "It's" means "it is."  It's easy once you grasp the concept.  Some examples:

THERE, THEIR, THEY'RE

Very common contextual errors, which spell checkers will not find. 

YOUR, YOU'RE, YOURS

KERNAL

Properly "kernel." There is a story, possibly apocryphal, that the front panels of some dozens of early computers had to be replaced in the field after the computers were installed because the label on the "kernel mode" light was misspelled this way. Sometimes carelessness can cost real money.

 

SEPERATE

Properly "separate." A very common spello, not limited to computer people.  A good mnemonic for this: "There is 'a rat' in 'separate.' "

 

DEFINATELY

Properly "definitely."  Think sort of finite, infinite, and de-finite as related. 

PRIVILEDGE, PRIVELEGE

Properly "privilege." Again, not limited to computer people, but we use the term much more often and therefore have many more opportunities to commit various barbarisms. Many similar words are mangled these days. 

NO		YES

priviledge	privilege
privelege	privilege
privaledge	privilege
alledged	alleged
ridgid		rigid

 

PROTOCALL

Properly "protocol." Perhaps there is an image of one participant "calling" another that causes this spello.

 

FLOURESCENT

Properly "fluorescent," unless you're referring to the glowing bread that's always warm from the Yucca Flats Bakery (or the cheap imitation from Three Mile Island Bakery).

 

ROLL, ROLE

"Roll" is a common misspelling for "role," meaning "part taken or played by someone."

 

EDITTING, EDITTED, TARGETTED

In the U.S.A., forming the participle from the present generally requires doubling the terminal consonant only if the accent would then (in the participle) cause the preceding short vowel to become long. This holds true generally for any suffix beginning with a vowel.

Example: "e'dit" (where the apostrophe indicates an accent) can become "e'dited" without a major change of pronunciation. The "i" is still short because there is no accent on the syllable. On the other hand, "re-fer'" cannot become "re-fer'ed" because it would then rhyme with "revered." Doubling the terminal consonant yields "re-ferr'ed" (rhymes with "absurd"), retaining the short vowel. Simple, eh?

PRESENT		PARTICIPLE

edit		edited, editing
target		targeted (if you think it's a verb)
travel		traveled, traveling
consider	considered, considering
layer		layered
differ		differed
journal		journaled, journaling (if it's a verb)

club		clubbed
plan		planned
pet		petted
jog		jogged
defer		deferred
refer		referred
confer		conferred
rebel (verb)	rebelled
recap		recapped

This rule differs in the U.K. and probably in Australia, and I don't know about Canada. In English English, the terminal consonant is (almost?) always doubled if it's an L. Even in the U.S., some words, such as "travelled" and "cancelled" are usually rendered with two Ls.

Every good rule has its glaring exceptions, and this one is no exception. Some people today are gainfully employed as programmers. They write programs for a living. Note that the terminal consonant is doubled even though the accent is on the first syllable. Maybe this odd spelling comes from the British "programme" instead of "program."

Similarly, today we format disks. The process is universally spelled "formatting" with two t's. And there are probably a number of other modern examples. Go figure.

 

USEABLE, USEAGE, TRUELY

Properly, "usable" and "usage" and "truly".  There is some confusion about when you drop the e. Similar rule to the one stated above about changing the pronunciation. If dropping the e and adding the suffix would cause the pronunciation of the ultimate consonant to change (from soft to hard c or g, for instance), then don't drop the e.

Keeping the e is quite rare, but mistakes can happen in both directions.

ROOT WORD	NO		YES

use		useage		usage
use		useable		usable
alternate	alternateing	alternating
practice	practiceing	practicing
surprise	surpriseing	surprising
true		truely		truly
glue		glueing		gluing
definite	definateley	definitely
hard		hardley		hardly
slow		slowley		slowly
age		ageing		aging (in the U.S.)

notice		noticable	noticeable
manage		managable	manageable, management
knowledge	knowledgable	knowledgeable
trace		tracable	traceable
advantage	advantagous	advantageous

One odd case is "queueing" as in "queueing theory." The word was invented only recently, and the commonly accepted spelling does, note, have five consecutive vowels. I think this spelling derives from visual aesthetics: "queuing" is just not quite so pleasing.  However, Mr. Google-Ngrams informs us that the short form is slightly more popular in the last few decades.

 

USEFULL

Properly "useful." Yes, a thing that is beautiful is full of beauty, but it isn't rendered that way in English anymore. Similarly for "hopeful," "helpful," "grateful," "wasteful," and many others.

 

PRACTICLY

Properly "practically." The adjective "practical" already contains the "-al" suffix, so add the "-ly" to it. A common error modifying words that end in "-ic" or "-ical."  Similarly for "theoreticly" and other adverbs.  

 

EXISTANCE, NON-EXISTANT

Properly, these end in "-ence" and "-ent."  There is a lot of confusion over endings such as "-ent" versus "-ant" and "-ible" versus "-able."  Often our pronunciation simply doesn't reflect the spelling; that's what dictionaries are for.

Misspellings of this type are extremely common, and our failure to challenge them when they appear in writing only perpetuates them by misleading a new generation of programmers and casual writers.  Most of these mistakes are just plain careless.  They originate from a lack of reading, but they persist because people pay less attention to their spell checkers than they probably should.  Those little red worms crawling under your words might signify something important. 

NO		YES

existance	existence
non-existant	non-existent
dependant	dependent
independant	independent
independance	independence
consistant	consistent (confused with constant?)
consistancy	consistency
inconsistant	inconsistent
intelligant	intelligent
competant	competent

persistant	persistent
persistance	persistence
primative	primitive (confused with primary?)
definate	definite
infinate	infinite
definately	definitely
visable		visible (confused with viable?)
flexable	flexible
devine		divine
delecate	delicate
compatable	compatible
incompatable	incompatible
responsable	responsible
occurrance	occurrence
convertable	convertible
incumbant	incumbent
coherant	coherent
sentance	sentence
violance	violence
negligance	negligence
opponant	opponent

stagnent	stagnant
redundent	redundant
dissadent	dissident (two mistakes!)

scandel		scandal
urben		urban
asylem		asylum
refinary	refinery

PRINCIPAL vs PRINCIPLE

Another confusion of endings. A "principle" is an ethical doctrine (and a lot of other things: look it up); a "principal" is a chief actor and the amount due on your mortgage (and a lot of other things, too). The most amusing misuse I've seen was the resume from the person claiming the title "Principle Software Writer." I don't think he/she got the job.

MEDIA

The plural of "medium." If a software product is distributed only in one magnetic form, then it uses "only one distribution medium," not "only one distribution media," as is commonly said and written. The same goes for news media: there are many different media, but a single newspaper is only one medium.

Similarly, "criteria" and "phenomena" are the plurals of "criterion" and "phenomenon," respectively. Similarly, "symposia" has recently been abused into a singular, but is properly the plural of "symposium."

Let's not talk about "data."

 

CEASAR or CEASER [SALAD]

PICKEL, NICKLE

(for pickle, nickel)

 

 

LISCENCE, LICENCE

(for license)

SUPERCEDE

Properly, "supersede."  At least twice that I know of, this misspelling has been inserted -- permanently -- into the syntax of computer languages.  Once some customer writes a script containing the word, you can't revoke it; you just have to add the correct spelling as a synonym, and promise to use a spell checker in the future. 

 

CONCIDERABLE, RESPONCE, RESOURSE

(for considerable, response, resource)

THEN, THAN

THEN is a conjunction that indicates a passage of time or a logical implication.  "I went to the store, and then I went home."

THAN is used in comparisons.  "Two heads are better than one."
 

HOMONYMS AND NEARLY SO

loose lose
lead led
peek peak pique
poll pole
read read red
roll role
shear sheer
shudder shutter
than then
past passed

Gross phonetic errors

 

HOMOGENOUS

Properly "homogeneous." The word is supposed to sound like "hoe-moe-JEE-knee-us" because it has another "e" in it. After you homogenize ("hoe-MAH-jen-eyes") something, such as milk, it is homogeneous.

 

BEARLY

Properly "barely," as in "Your performance is barely tolerable. If it were any worse, it would be unbearable."

 

EXPLANE

(for explain)

 

MUTE

(for moot, which almost no one understands anyway)

 

DISBURSE

(for disperse)

 

GUEST

(for guessed, and vice versa)

 

TALE

(for tail, and vice versa)

 

PIECE

(for peace, and vice versa)

 

[WEB] SIGHT

(for site)

PROCEEDURE

(for procedure; mistake prompted by "proceed")

Standard thinkos

 

MORE or MOST UNIQUE, MOST FEASIBLE

(comparative superlatives)

 

PROACTIVE

(by analogy with reactive, but nonexistent)

 

RESPECTIVELY

(malapropism for respectfully)

Lost causes, some word confusions, some just grammar

 

BETWEEN YOU AND I, BETWEEN SHE AND I (cringe)

Properly, "between you and me" and "between her and me." Prepositions, like "between" and "like," take the objective case as their objects. We wouldn't even think of saying "The truck ran over he." Same thing.  Think of "just between us chickens. . . ."  "Between us" not "between we."

 

WHO, WHOM, WHOEVER, WHOMEVER

Almost hopeless, but try these, I hope, simple rules. 

• If it's the subject of a verb, use "who."  Examples: "Who is at the door?" or "Who gave you that hickey?"  If you would naturally say "he" or "she" rather than "him" or "her" then it's probably a subject. 
  
• If it's the object of a verb or a preposition, use "whom."  Examples: "You shot whom?" or "To whom did you give the money?" or "Whom did you give the money to?" (order doesn't matter; "whom" is still the object of the preposition "to") or "Whom do you love?" (with apologies to Bo Diddley).  If you would naturally say "him" or "her" then it's probably an object. 
  
• The tricky part is when the "who" is the subject of a subordinate clause which clause is itself the object of a verb or a preposition.  Examples: "Give the extra ticket to whoever shows up first" ("whoever" is the subject of the verb "shows up", but the whole clause "whoever shows up first" is the object of the preposition "to"); or "I like people who say what they mean" ("who" is the subject of "say" even though the whole clause is the (appositive) object of the verb "like").
• The really tricky part is when the "whom" is the object of a clause that is the subject of a sentence.  Example: "Whomever you elect next week will eventually disappoint you."  ("Whomever" is the object of "you elect", but the whole clause "whomever you elect" is the subject of the verb "will disappoint.")
  

 

LIE, LAY

Different words with different meanings, and endlessly confusing.  Lie is to repose.  Lay is to place.  (Lie is also falsehood, but that is an entirely different meaning and not confused with these.) 

TENSE		EXAMPLE

present		Please lie down on the examining table.
present		You have been lying in the sun too long.  
past		She pushed him, and he lay back smiling.  
past		The cat lay in wait for its victim.  	

present		Lay the board on the workbench, please.
past		When the concrete arrived, they laid the foundation.
past		He laid out his suit for tomorrow.  

present !WRONG!	Lay, lady, lay.  Lay across my big, brass bed.
		(Dylan used poetic license; it sounds better.  No problema.)

 

CHOOSE, CHOSE, LOSE, LOOSE, LEAD, LED

Often mistaken due to similar pronunciations. Most of them are verbs.

TENSE		EXAMPLE

present		Choose one from column A and one from column B.
past		On yesterday's quiz, I chose the wrong answer.

present		My mommy told me not to lose my wallet.
past		I lost my mind, but it was no big deal.

present		Lead us not into temptation.
past		You led me to believe this crap.  
(participle)	I was led astray.		

"Loose" is not the same as "lose."  It isn't often a verb at all; it's mostly an adjective, as in "This doorknob is loose." 

The other kind of "lead" is a heavy metal.

 

COMPRISE

Often used backwards.  On television, almost always used backwards.  The verb "comprise" is a synonym for "include" or "contain" or "embrace."  It is not a fancy version of "compose."  Look it up.  Properly, the whole comprises the parts, just as the whole includes the parts. The parts compose the whole.  The whole is composed of its parts, if you like passives (a subject for another day).  Yes, a story comprises three parts: beginning, middle, and end.  No, the several chapters do not comprise the book.

Now, on the lighter side, we have a poem from a man who knows how to do it and simply doesn't want to.

Subj:	Starbuck is a Prof. at BU who resides in lovely Milford, NH...
Subj:	fyi (and, to you Ripley Superspellers, SO THEIR!)

*The Spell Against Spelling*

	a poem
to be inscribed
		in dark places
	and
never to be spoken aloud

				GEORGE E. STARBUCK


My favorite student lately is the one who wrote about feeling clumbsy.
I mean if he wanted to say how it feels to be all thumbs he
Certainly picked the write language to right in the first place.
I mean better to clutter a word up like the old Hearst place
Than to just walk off the job and not give a dam.

Another student gave me a diagragm.
"The Diagragm of the Plot in Henry the VIIIth."

Those, though, were instances of the sublime.
The wonder is in the wonders they can come up with every time.

Why do they all say heighth, but never weighth?
If chrystal can look like English to them, how come chryptic can't?
I guess cwm, chthonic, qanat, or quattrocento
Always gets looked up.  But never momento.
Momento they know.  Like wierd.  Like differant.
It is a part of their deep deep-structure vocabulary:
Their stone axe, their dark bent-offering to the gods:
Their protoCro-Magnon pre-pre-sapient survival-against-cultural-odds.

You won't get ME deputized in some Spelling Constabulary.
I'd sooner abandon the bag-toke-whiff system and go decimal.
I'm on their side.  I better be, after my brush with "infinitessimal."

There it was, right where I put it, in my brand-new book.
And my friend Peter Davison read it, and he gave me this look,
And he held the book for a little while and said, "George..."

I needed my students at that moment.  I, their Scourge.
I needed them.  Needed their sympathy.  Needed their care.
"Their their," I needed to hear them say, "their their."

You see, there are SPELLERS in this world, I mean mean ones too.
They shadow us around like a posse of Joe Btfsplks
Waiting for us to sit down at our study-desks and go shrdlu
So they can pop in at the windows saying "tsk tsk."

I know they're there.  I know where the beggars are,
With their flash cards looking like prescriptions for the catarrh
And their mnemnmonics, blast 'em.  They go too farrh.
I do not stoop to impugn, indict, or condemn;
But I know how to get at the likes of thegm.

For a long time, I keep mumb.
I let 'em wait, while a preternatural calmn
Rises to me from the depths of my upwardly opened palmb.
Then I raise my eyes like some wizened-and-wisened gnolmbn,
Stranger to scissors, stranger to razor and coslmbn,
And I fix those birds with my gaze till my gaze strikes hoslgmbn,
And I say one word, and the word that I say is "Oslgmbnh."

"Om?" they inquire.  "No, not exactly.  OSLGMBNH.
Watch me carefully while I pronounce it because you've got only two 
		more guesses
And you only get one more hint:  there's an odd number of esses,
And you only get ten more seconds no nine more seconds no eight
And a right answer doesn't count if it comes in late
And a wrong answer bumps you out of the losers' bracket
And disqualifies you for the National Spellathon Contestant jacket
And that's all the time extension you're going to gebt
So go pick up your consolation prizes from the usherebt
And don't be surprised if it's the bowdlerized regularized paperback 
		abridgment of Pepys
Because around here, gentlemen, we play for kepys."

Then I drive off in my chauffeured Cadillac Fleetwood Brougham
Like something out of the last days of Fellini's Rougham
And leave them smiting their brows and exclaiming to each other
		"Ougham!
O-U-G-H-A-M Ougham!" and tearing their hair.

Intricate are the compoundments of despair.

Well, brevity must be the soul of something-or-other.

Not, certainly, of spelling, in the good old mother
Tongue of Shakespeare, Raleigh, Marvell, and Vaughan.
But something.  One finds out as one goes aughan.


[Published in BOSTONIA, March 1984]

Fresh, new evidence of rampant illiteracy and abuse, since the latest draft

carear, guarentee, 
high-jacking [a new low]
strick [for strict] [typical of sounds-like spelling]
desease [for disease] [similarly]
comprise [for compromise]
teanage [a new low]

[almost all of these atrocities make my teeth hurt.]

Then there are mistakes that even educated people make:

wreck havoc [for wreak]
site instead of sight, or vice versa

All contents copyright (C) 1984,1995,2006,2008,2014, Richard Landau. All rights reserved.
Revised: October 31, 2014.