Chapter 63
College Sprawl
01a - Introduction
01b - The Mysterious Ski Rack
01c - Wheres the Other Half of That Moose
01d - Scorpions Scorpio
01e - The Waiter Who Didnt Yall
02a - Can I Get a Diet Soda
02b - Riding Into the Sunrise
03 - Modesty at Any Price
04 - Driving Down to Houston
05a - What Does That Sign Say
05b - The State Tree
05c - They Call It the Sunbelt
05d - Just Follow Your Nose
06 - The New House
07a - Billboards
07b - Billboards Again
08 - Stereo Upgrade
09 - Local Wineries
10 - Unintentionally Left Blank
11 - CBW in TX
12 - Ice House Radio
13 - Goats and Cotton
14 - Dig We Must
15 - Dan Moody
16 - Dry Heat
17 - Dead Animals We Have Known
18a - Bookstore Culture
18b - On the Open Road
19 - Weather
20 - Sightings in Bertram and Buchanan
21 - Too Many Birds
22 - Road Hazards
23 - Sightings To And From Houston
24 - The Great Wall of Train
25 - In the Heat of the Day
26 - Bite Me
27 - Bid on This Skeleton
28 - Willie Al Fresco
29 - Rural Countryside
30 - SUV SUX!
31 - Kinky on the Texas Monthly Hour
32 - Strange Yellow Sky
33 - Football is a Serious Enterprise in Texas
34 - Remember the Alamoo!
35 - What Was That on the Radio
36 - Trip to Houston Through Small Towns
37 - Shoe Story
38 - Unintended Fireworks
39 - Flash Flood Warning
40 - Sin City
41 - Live Music in Austin But Not in Clubs
42 - Fear of Overpass
43 - The Big Sneezy
44 - New Texas
45 - Front Ended by the French Fry Mobile
46 - Dirt Farm
47 - Heard at the Texas Book Festival 2008
48 - Heard at the Texas Book Festival 2009
49 - Central Time Sucks
50 - Temple Texas
51 - Christmas in Austin
52 - Pennants in the Wind
53 - The Road Less Traveled
54 - Texas-size Thunderstorm
55 - Cool Van
56 - Your New House is That-A-Way
57 - CSI Austin
58 - New MTV Game Show
59 - Equine Technology
60 - Look at That Prairie
61 - Get Your Water Here
62 - Corporate Anniversaries
63 - College Sprawl
64 - Hire These Guys
65 - Preparing for Winter
66 - Careful What You Overhear
67 - Bonnie Raitt
68 - Perfume
69 - Questionable Skills
70 - All-American Day
71 - Read Me
72 - Weird Fog
73 - Overpackaged Food
74 - What Town Was That
75 - Texas Book Festival 2010
76 - Bulletproof Roof
77 - The Oldest Photo
78 - Cheesesteaks Part 1
79 - Cheesesteaks Part 2
80 - Sure We Got Culture
81 - A Message to Gyno-Americans
82 - The cathedral of Junk

Texas A&M

Went out to see College Station. UT is right in downtown Austin. What does A&M look like? It's only a Texas mile away -- a hundred miles -- so I hopped over for the afternoon.

Land grant college, huge open spaces.

There is a little bit of actual town over on the side, you know, the usual buildings and sidewalks, a neighborhood, but only about six blocks square, tiny.

There are three "bookstores" within four blocks on University Avenue, but when you walk in, all they have is Aggie T shirts, racks on racks of white shirts with purple logos, purple shirts with white letters, purple shorts, pennants, no sweats because this is after all Texas and it's ninety degrees outside. Oh, and the occasional notebook. Look closer, and there's a long counter in the back. And behind the counter, shelving. Shelves, with books on them. Aha, it *is* a bookstore! Yes, but the stacks are closed to the public, and they have only the books for this term's courses. There's no other bookstore-like aspect there. Wait, to be fair, one of the stores had two stands of "exam notes," which was more depressing than enlightening. Two of the stores were kind enough to let me browse through the stacks. But the stacks are rather small, about a thousand feet of shelf space -- for forty thousand students. The Coop, if memory serves, is several times larger than that, for one-quarter of the student body, and it has two floors of real bookstore underneath. There is a real bookstore here, a Barnes & Noble out on Texas Avenue. There must be some real indy bookstores in a college town that size, but the few that I saw just didn't make it as bookstores. I didn't get to the University store in the student center; maybe that's better.

I was instructed that I must see the Dixie Chicken. This is a long, dark, western bar, floors and tables of old wood, feet up on the tables or playing dominoes or cards, a dozen pool tables, long bars, pitchers of beer and greaseburgers. Looks like a fun place, if one wants to be rowdy.

The campus itself is about three square miles of land grant architecture, open grassland dotted with square wedding-cake buildings. Seen from ground level, they're brick rectangles with little glass holes in them. The buildings are spread out very widely, more than I can imagine coming from the crowded Northeast. Take the table for a wedding cake and put a couple dozen petit fours on it, and you get the idea. There are four or five hundred buildings, but they're spread over miles and miles of campus.

Given the huge distances on flat ground, I expected to see lots of bicycles. Nope, only a few. But parking lots and four-lane roads through the campus complete with left turn lanes into the parking garages. And people all over the place with backpacks. Driving through the campus is surprisingly slow, though, despite the large roads. I think they got a quantity discount on stop signs.

At the edge of the road on the south side of the football stadium, there is a flood ruler at the curb. You know, a six foot high sign marked every six inches up to the five foot level, so you can decide whether to drive your SUX through the four feet of water. I'm kind of amazed by this. The area is so flat that, if this spot is under five feet of water, so is everything for a mile in every direction. Slight aside: the stadium, Kyle Field, is just your average college stadium that seats eighty thousand.

The town of Bryan, I'm sorry to report, is the heavy industrial neighborhood attached to the nice town. Joe's Auto Body Shop is the cleanest business there. Driving down Texas Ave., which is the main drag, the character of the place changes right at the "Leaving Bryan - Entering College Station" sign.

On the way back on FM50 (farm to market road), I drove through miles of cotton fields. Most of them had been picked recently. Some of the plants still have little white balls on a few of the stalks. Down both sides of the road, the grass was lined with zillions of cotton balls, the debris that got away from automated picking machines, I guess, blown by the wind and cars to get stuck in the grass on the shoulders. Here and there are groups of bales of cotton. These are not "Tow that barge. Lift that bale." type bales. No, you'd have to be a crane to lift one of these bales. They're the size of trailers, as in tractor-trailers, covered with plastic tarps and staked down to the ground, clustered in groups of half a dozen or more every mile.

Why is the town of Caldwell filled with sculpture? There are at least fifteen of them in small groups, along the road on front lawns. Metal sculptures, some sort of representational, some not. Have to go back and find out.

At dusk I'm driving on a country road straight as an arrow. There are red lights off in the distance. Must be the taillights of a car or truck ahead, right? Huh, what? They turn green. It's the red light at the next intersection. Nothing unusual about that, except that it's five miles away. It goes green-yellow-red twice before I get to it. At seventy miles an hour.